Sis,I may seems to be insane and happy all the time.But eventually im not,just that i've got no time to pour everything out as time is getting nearer.I could only choose to smile,laugh and be crazy all the times rather than keep thinking of where i will be at and how long my freedom will be paused,how fast my hair's gonna get back to mushroom style.Although all i could think of,everything's on my mind's my sentence,and when i will get my consequences i still cant show it out.Because there's no use and noone could help.Sometimes i really feel like ending everything,i dont wanna go in and i dont wanna run from it.The only choice is to end it.Still thinking what should i do,though im sorta fickleminded all the times,but this time round i really have to be..Cus the choice that i made gonna determine part of my future.Just hope that i wont get in Sgh,As i rather Cwp than Sgh.Maybe cause of the period of time i've gotto sit?But my feeling is,i will still get in Sgh for 2 years afterall,Dont know why just that feeling.Thats why im thinking wheather should i run and run till my probation's over this september then i go surrender..From 3 years ago till now,i didnt celebrate new year,christmas nor my own birthday happily with full freedom and my waist length hair before..Always without full freedom,living with the stress of timing afraid of the little small things we do,and my hair was never over shoulder length before since 3 years ago,once it reach shoulder something will happen and then it will go back to my mushroom head again and again.Not the first time but the third time though.Seriously,anyone teach me what to do,i seriously dont know what im gonna do for thisssssssssssss): Super stress,cant i enjoy once with stress of this kinda thing just for a day?Please goshhhhhh,My minds tired enough to just close its eyes even when its crossing the road..Gosh,veryvery tired.The thing i cant gave up most is my hair and freedom.I could take others,like even if im poor,im alone without any friends i could take it but please dont take away my hair and my freedom..I couldnt take it,not even a little bit.Might be meeting Delphia leong later..Haha,She's so cute being a clown early in the morning.Sis,If i really never run and i go in for long,please dont be so clumsy and silly or naive..Dont trust anybody,as in you could but dont trust totally..Trust only yourself totally,and not even one other than yourself fully.. Learn to takecare of yourself properly,and go with the right clique..Choose the right things to do,dont be like me,in and out for dont know how many years then everything will end,you will be tired physically and mentally,and till the day come you will be like me.Totally gave up in changing.Take good care of yourself,understand?Indenpendence is the best.Dont be too honest in everything,sometimes it brings disappointments..I will miss you if i really go in for long ok?Sorry if im irratating at times,but im just trying to make myself happy,and not pulling a sulky face and spoils everyone's mood.I love you, and i will never forget that day yishun,how we knew each other..You were sitting opposite me offering me your prawn crackers wearing pink fbt,black singlet and black cardigan,hair with golden extensions tying to the side(:Haha,Dont forget me alright.Though i know its almost impossible to,cause it aint a short period of time anymore.Learn to be strong,and i love you love you love you,Makmak,ManyMany